The lesson today is taken from the Acts of Housecleaning, according to St. Byron and St. Thomasina, chapter 6, verse 17.
“And lo, the season was upon them wherein the dust bunnies had multiplied, and they were so large and numerous that they could no longer be countenanced, and the man took up arms to do battle. And though the dust bunnies were manifold, the man conjured a vile and howling demon who bore the name Bissell. And the demon was unleashed upon the face of the apartment and the dust bunnies were no more. But the demon’s screams were terrible as it went from place to place, and there was no sanctuary for us, and we were sore afraid.”
Thus endeth the lesson.